Last night Fiona's new boyfriend Paisley hosted a little do at his flat for all of our friends. He was really trying to butter up Fi so she'd forget about that whole unfortunate buggering-the-stable-boy incident. I don't think it worked, but the party was super fun.
Pais has a terrible flat, and by terrible I mean of course fabulous. It's simply stuffed with horrifying art, the focal point being a giant, big-headed portrait of his former girlfriend, Millicent Maitland-Clottingsley. Fi is not happy about the piece, but it is apparently Important Art by an Important Artist, and so she allows it because it makes Paisley seem as if he's cultured and aware instead of simply being pissed all the time and snorting coke in loos.
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| Poor Milly. Truly. Poor, poor Milly. Just look at those absolutely immense thighs. |
Naturally, Sinjun was there in purple socks and red trousers, which I might have taken the piss about except that I was wearing leggings as trousers and as such endured lots of camel jokes all night long.
And Sinjun's mum showed up in a red silky blouse and did a dance on the reclaimed refectory table and broke a seventeenth-century snuffbox, and Paisley went into a snit about it because it held a gramme of coke and so we all spent a few minutes under the table like bloodhounds snorting it off the floor.
Truly, a grand party. I hope you've had as many joyous times! I do love the holidays.
XXOO
J
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